When Your Biggest Doubters Are The People That Love You
Dealing with beloved doubters
I speak at a lot of events. I know that most people would rather take a punch in the face, then get up and talk to a crowd of people.
I love it, I’m apparently rather good and I know people benefit from me sharing my experiences.
But it was at an event on Friday night in Melbourne where I was asked, live on stage (and livestreamed around the world) ‘how I dealt with loved ones that didn’t believe in me or my ideas?’
So, why is it the ones that often love us the best, doubt us the most?
Well, we will always have doubters in our lives, not the dickhead negative nancy’s who probably aren’t even convinced the earth is flat because they have never seen it themselves from space, but the ones that know use, love us and truly care for us.
Being in business is hard.
Beginning a business is one of the toughest things you will ever do.
That is why so many people don’t do it.
But why is it that your beloved people, can’t understand what you are trying to create and don’t see the vision?
You would think your loved ones would support your decisions, but they can’t.
Most people just want to be comfortable and starting and maintaining your own business is very uncomfortable and sometimes a down right pain in the ass.
The good news is that, it is not about you, it is them.
Because, it is not their vision.
In fact, most people don’t have a vision for their life.
They have no ideas, thoughts or plans as to what they want to do or achieve so they can’t understand.
And I say this with love, but their problems aren’t yours.
Maybe they lived through tough times and saw other friends and families businesses fail.
Maybe they had an opportunity once and it didn’t work out.
Maybe they are embarrassed that they never really took their chance.
Generally this comes from a place of love, they don’t want you to get hurt.
And that this what you need to remember when they are consistently telling you about others failures or as is often the case, totally ignoring what it is that you are doing.
But you need to protect yourself and protect your vision.
The best way is to surround yourself with like-minded people.
Tap into groups, online or offline, go into forums, attend meet ups, listen to podcasts, read successful peoples biographies.
Surround yourself with people that are creators, visionaries, influencers, those that see the potential in people and can help you to work towards what it is you envision.
Anything that you can do to stop the leaching of self-doubt from the negative words, to your mind, will make a difference.
Remember, those that love you, may have loved you a long time.
They smiled when you said you wanted to be an astronaut, ballerina, vet or racing car driver. Wiped the blood off your knees when you scrapped them and picked up when you fell.
No doubt that they will pick up again, if need be and I hope that they will smile and applaud when they see you are successfully ‘walking’ your vision.